Early this week I had decided that I was going to try to change my outlook and be more positive about things in general. I was going to be starting my first week of three at Chipotle full time. The semester is over so my adjuncting job is over and I need to make up the money. I thought to myself, this is the most temporary of situations, I'm going to be working there only 3 weeks full time/ 5 days a week. We are moving so soon and our life is about to get hectic so I just wanted to be more calm, more positive, and more patient.
Monday night after I got home from work I broke out in some kind of huge, red, scary looking rash. It was covering my entire stomach and thighs and a little bit of my legs, chest, and shoulders. Giant red welts. It freaked me out! It itched to high heavens. Only thing BJ and I could figure after some googling because we both were like WTF?!?!?!!!! is that I had some kind of allergic reaction to the soap residue in his shower poof (I had never used it before cuz I don't usually shower in his bathroom).
It seemed to go away the next morning and I was fine at work until about 6. I was itching mildly but by the time I was home from work and had gotten Cameron to bed the itchy, burny sensation was unbearable.This time my entire back was covered and so BRIGHT RED! My shoulders and chest along with my thighs and stomach were pretty bad but not nearly as bad as my back. I'm thinking this definitely isn't an allergic reaction to any soap residue. But my wonderful man went and got some benadryl for me and it helped so much with the itching. We did some googling around again and finally figured out I had hives. I had these once before when I was a kid.
I also have been having this weird thing with the palms of my hands and soles of my feet where these purply red marks come up and they're hot and tender. Those popped up on Tuesday night as well.
Acid reflux (the kind that feels like someone is running a dull knife up and down your esophagus) woke me up at about 5 in the morning. We didn't have any zantac which is the only thing that helps with my acid reflux but I decided to try to use the baking soda water trick I had to do one time when I was pregnant with Cam after eating 5 Tums didn't help. That didn't help either. I had to be to work at 8 so I got in the shower at 6:30 and puked up tums and baking soda.
I left for work early and got some zantac and I made it through Wednesday at work just fine, no hives, the acid reflux slowly subsided. Every day so far this week I managed to maintain a good attitude at work. I didn't dread going in. I was pretty friendly with everyone.
That night the hives didn't really pop up. I had a few tiny itchy patches. But it was bearable. But the hand thing (it was only my palms this month) oh it was so bad. Worse than it's ever been. My hands were hot and felt tight and tender. The areas that were purply red were burning.
I woke up Thursday and it was hard to bend my fingers for a bit but it got better. All day at work my hands were unusually sensitive to heat. But still no hives and it was a good day.
Thursday night the hives came back. I had no huge patches but just little red welts (hives) ALL OVER. Yay Benadryl!
Woke up Friday morning and I was more itchy than I had been other mornings. But it was bearable. Until about 2:30 when I was in the grill area which is by far the HOTTEST part of the place. By 3 I was looking at the clock lamenting the fact that I had 4 and half more hours to work. I couldn't wait to be done making chips and I hustled through my 4 heaping pans. I found myself on the line the rest of the night working tortilla (the hottest position on the line) and broke down and took just 1 benadryl.
I finally couldn't handle it and just couldn't be friendly. I could be cordial but let my irritation show. Was exaggeratedly nice to a few people. Once the benadryl kicked in I felt myself physically relax and begin to have a better night. But I was ditzy and drowsy and still slightly irritated.
I can't help but feel that I was tested the entire week. Like the cosmos were fucking with me for vowing to change the way I look at things. I don't think I failed now that I'm home and chilling. I'm happy to have the next two days off and I think I did a pretty damn good job of remaining positive this week. I'm pretty itchy right now but I don't really want to take benadryl because I just want to hang out with my man and enjoy his company. I'm feeling pretty good despite the itching and I am feeling like I deserve it. Even if I low-level lost my cool today.
